Tuesday, September 24, 2013
Social Work Through the Eyes of an Abused Child
Sunday I spent 5 hours with a 5 year old child who is a guest at the shelter I work at. The child has been sexually abused in her past and has some serious behavioral issues. I wont tell you too much because it is her life, and I don't want to display that. While she spent time with me in the office, we talked about her sexual abuse. It was a difficult conversation, she spoke more about her abuse than she ever had in the past. As she spoke, she insisted on playing on my iPad and took about a zillion photos. I later looked at all these photos she took of me and was just taken back. These are through the eyes of a sexually abused child while she talks with a social worker about her abuse and pain.
Tuesday, September 10, 2013
Crying
I cried three times in the past 24 hours. Is it a coincidence I am also on my period? Maybe. Probably.
But I was thinking, I don't cry too often, maybe I should. You always hear the phase "a good cry" but how the hell can crying be fun? Your make up gets ruined, eyes get puffy, your sad usually. What's fun about any of that? But I took a nap shortly after I cried and it was a nice relaxing nap, like I cried all my anxieties away.
What makes you cry?
I cry about my family, or sad things that happened in my past, sometimes I cry about boys (but I haven't done that in a long time.)
Music also makes me cry sometimes.
1. My personal favorite - 96 Tears by ? and the Mysterians
2. Crying - Roy Orbison
3. Cry Baby Cry - The Beatles
4. Many people get annoyed by how much I play this song. Big Girls Don't Cry - The Four Seasons
5. If You Don't Cry - The Magnetic Fields
6. "Well, not everyone likes Oasis..." Stop Crying Your Heart Out - Oasis
7. When Doves Cry - Prince
8. The Crying Tree of Mercury - The Smashing Pumpkins
Now songs that have actually made me cry is a much longer list. I will just give some I remember specific instances of crying to (I'll limit the amount of Bright Eyes, but hey. I was 15 once.) Some might be totally lame but whatever, I cried like a baby when I was six and I heard Pearl Jam's cover of Last Kiss. Some of these brought upon full fledged bash my head in panic attacks (ex. Wise Up or Kids). Some of these aren't even sad songs, just something about them made me really sad and moved me. Some cry experiences may have also been chemical influenced.
1. Kings Crossing - Elliott Smith - duh no brainer
2. Everything's Not Lost - Coldplay
3. Last Kiss - Pearl Jam
4. My Friends - Red Hot Chili Peppers
5. Amphetamine - Everclear
6. Fond Farewell - Elliott Smith
7. At the Bottom of Everything - Bright Eyes
8. Do You Feel At Home - Commander Venus
9. Mayonnaise - The Smashing Pumpkins
10. Brick - Ben Folds
11. Wish You Were Here - Pink Floyd
12. Cashmir Pulsaki Day - Sufjan Stevens
13. Condor Ave. - Elliott Smith
14. Lucky Man - The Verve
15. Thirteen - Big Star
16. Falling Through Your Clothes - The New Pornographers
17. Bleeding Heart Show - The New Pornographers
18. Hot Knives - Bright Eyes
19. 7th Symphony-2nd Movement - Beethoven - this was a seven minute cry fest
20. Wise Up - Aimee Mann
21. This Projector - The White Stripes
22. Kids - MGMT
23. Pumped Up Kicks - Foster the People
24. Electronic Renaissance - Belle and Sebastian
25. Baby Bitch - Ween
26. Neighborhoods # 1 (Tunnels) - Arcade Fire
27. I Don't Know - The Beastie Boys - LONG LIVE MCA
28. She's Always A Woman to Me - Billy Joel
29. Anything You Want - Roy Orbison
30. Thirteen - Ben Kweller
31. Sleepyhouse - Blind Melon
32. True Affection - The Blow
33. Don't Watch Me Dancing - Little Joy
34. Dancing Days - Led Zeppelin
35. Sunday Bloody Sunday - U2
36. Waltz 2 - Elliott Smith
37. Coffee and TV - Blur
38. Gouge Away - Pixies
39. Romulus - Sufjan Stevens
40. Skinny Love - Bon Iver
41. All I Really Wanna Do - Bob Dylan
42. Dropping Out of School - Brad Sucks
43. Everyone Says - Brian Jonestown Massacre
44. Velvet Waltz - Built to Spill
45. Glycerine - Bush
46. She Gathers Rain - Collective Soul
47. Live Through This - Hole
48. Do Ri Me - Nirvana
49. And The Hazy Sea - Cymbals Eat Guitars
50. The Scientist - Coldplay
51. Walking the Cow - Daniel Johnston
52. Now She Sleeps In a Box in The Good Soil of Denmark - David and the Citizens
53. Crooked Teeth - Deathcab for Cutie
54. Pink Maggit - Deftones
55. Daddy Never Understood - Deluxx Folk Implosion
56. Everything Counts - Depeche Mode
57. Return to Innocence - Enya - No shame.
58. London (alternative version) - Third Eye Blind
59. Praise You - Fatboy Slim
60. Waitin' For a Superman (Is it Getting Heavy?) - The Flaming Lips
61. See You - Foo Fighters
62. Fire Coming Out of a Monkey's Head - Gorillaz
63. Damage I've Done - The Heads
64. Cruel Reminder - Heatmiser
65. I'll Believe In Anything - Wolf Parade
66. Plainclothes Man - Heatmiser
67. Wish You Were Here - Incubus
68. The Only Living Boy in New York - Simon and Garfunkel
69. Passing Afternoon - Iron and Wine
70. My Drug Buddy - The Lemonheads
71. Saint Joe On the School Bus - Marcy Playground
72. Oh Comely - Neutral Milk Hotel
73. Down In It - Nine Inch Nails
74. Been a Son - Nirvana
75. Oh Me - Nirvana
76. It's a Shame About Ray - The Lemonheads
77. Don't Look Back In Anger - Oasis
78. 4am - Our Lady Peace
79. We are Underused - Pavement
80. Your Sickness - Pinkback
81. Stop Breathing - Pavement
82. Hey - Pixies
83. Special K - Placebo
84. Trains - Porcupine Tree
85. Recycled Air - The Postal Service
86. Standing Outside a Broken Phone Booth With Money In my Hand - Primitive Radio Gods
87. Imitation of Life - REM
88. The Bends - Radiohead
89. Creep - Radiohead - I bet all y'all cried to this some one drunk night
90. Kiss Off - Violent Femmes
91. Suicide Medicine - Rocky Votolato
92. Alone, Jealous, and Stoned - Secret Machines
93. Saint Simon - The Shins - Funny, this is the ONLY Shins song that ever made me cry. Sorry, Garden State.
94. Good Things - Sleater Kinney
95. Thirty-Three - The Smashing Pumpkins
96. Beautiful- The Smashing Pumpkins
97. Sick of Goodbyes - Sparklehorse
98. Up The Junction - Squeeze
99. Tempted - Squeeze
100. Alcoholiday - Teenage Fanclub
Well that's 100 damn songs. I will only add two more.
The most recently discovered song that makes me cry - Mockingbirds - Grant Lee Buffalo
This has song serious tear jerking abilities.
Lastly, the song I listened to on repeat in the saddest moment of my life (thus far) Kiwi Maddog 20 20 - Elliott Smith
But I was thinking, I don't cry too often, maybe I should. You always hear the phase "a good cry" but how the hell can crying be fun? Your make up gets ruined, eyes get puffy, your sad usually. What's fun about any of that? But I took a nap shortly after I cried and it was a nice relaxing nap, like I cried all my anxieties away.
What makes you cry?
I cry about my family, or sad things that happened in my past, sometimes I cry about boys (but I haven't done that in a long time.)
Music also makes me cry sometimes.
Here is some of my favorite songs about crying:
1. My personal favorite - 96 Tears by ? and the Mysterians
2. Crying - Roy Orbison
3. Cry Baby Cry - The Beatles
5. If You Don't Cry - The Magnetic Fields
6. "Well, not everyone likes Oasis..." Stop Crying Your Heart Out - Oasis
7. When Doves Cry - Prince
8. The Crying Tree of Mercury - The Smashing Pumpkins
Now songs that have actually made me cry is a much longer list. I will just give some I remember specific instances of crying to (I'll limit the amount of Bright Eyes, but hey. I was 15 once.) Some might be totally lame but whatever, I cried like a baby when I was six and I heard Pearl Jam's cover of Last Kiss. Some of these brought upon full fledged bash my head in panic attacks (ex. Wise Up or Kids). Some of these aren't even sad songs, just something about them made me really sad and moved me. Some cry experiences may have also been chemical influenced.
Songs that have actually made me cry:
1. Kings Crossing - Elliott Smith - duh no brainer
2. Everything's Not Lost - Coldplay
3. Last Kiss - Pearl Jam
4. My Friends - Red Hot Chili Peppers
5. Amphetamine - Everclear
6. Fond Farewell - Elliott Smith
7. At the Bottom of Everything - Bright Eyes
8. Do You Feel At Home - Commander Venus
9. Mayonnaise - The Smashing Pumpkins
10. Brick - Ben Folds
11. Wish You Were Here - Pink Floyd
12. Cashmir Pulsaki Day - Sufjan Stevens
13. Condor Ave. - Elliott Smith
14. Lucky Man - The Verve
15. Thirteen - Big Star
16. Falling Through Your Clothes - The New Pornographers
17. Bleeding Heart Show - The New Pornographers
18. Hot Knives - Bright Eyes
19. 7th Symphony-2nd Movement - Beethoven - this was a seven minute cry fest
20. Wise Up - Aimee Mann
21. This Projector - The White Stripes
22. Kids - MGMT
23. Pumped Up Kicks - Foster the People
24. Electronic Renaissance - Belle and Sebastian
25. Baby Bitch - Ween
26. Neighborhoods # 1 (Tunnels) - Arcade Fire
27. I Don't Know - The Beastie Boys - LONG LIVE MCA
28. She's Always A Woman to Me - Billy Joel
29. Anything You Want - Roy Orbison
30. Thirteen - Ben Kweller
31. Sleepyhouse - Blind Melon
32. True Affection - The Blow
33. Don't Watch Me Dancing - Little Joy
34. Dancing Days - Led Zeppelin
35. Sunday Bloody Sunday - U2
36. Waltz 2 - Elliott Smith
37. Coffee and TV - Blur
38. Gouge Away - Pixies
39. Romulus - Sufjan Stevens
40. Skinny Love - Bon Iver
41. All I Really Wanna Do - Bob Dylan
42. Dropping Out of School - Brad Sucks
43. Everyone Says - Brian Jonestown Massacre
44. Velvet Waltz - Built to Spill
45. Glycerine - Bush
46. She Gathers Rain - Collective Soul
47. Live Through This - Hole
48. Do Ri Me - Nirvana
49. And The Hazy Sea - Cymbals Eat Guitars
50. The Scientist - Coldplay
51. Walking the Cow - Daniel Johnston
52. Now She Sleeps In a Box in The Good Soil of Denmark - David and the Citizens
53. Crooked Teeth - Deathcab for Cutie
54. Pink Maggit - Deftones
55. Daddy Never Understood - Deluxx Folk Implosion
56. Everything Counts - Depeche Mode
57. Return to Innocence - Enya - No shame.
58. London (alternative version) - Third Eye Blind
59. Praise You - Fatboy Slim
60. Waitin' For a Superman (Is it Getting Heavy?) - The Flaming Lips
61. See You - Foo Fighters
62. Fire Coming Out of a Monkey's Head - Gorillaz
63. Damage I've Done - The Heads
64. Cruel Reminder - Heatmiser
65. I'll Believe In Anything - Wolf Parade
66. Plainclothes Man - Heatmiser
67. Wish You Were Here - Incubus
68. The Only Living Boy in New York - Simon and Garfunkel
69. Passing Afternoon - Iron and Wine
70. My Drug Buddy - The Lemonheads
71. Saint Joe On the School Bus - Marcy Playground
72. Oh Comely - Neutral Milk Hotel
73. Down In It - Nine Inch Nails
74. Been a Son - Nirvana
75. Oh Me - Nirvana
76. It's a Shame About Ray - The Lemonheads
77. Don't Look Back In Anger - Oasis
78. 4am - Our Lady Peace
79. We are Underused - Pavement
80. Your Sickness - Pinkback
81. Stop Breathing - Pavement
82. Hey - Pixies
83. Special K - Placebo
84. Trains - Porcupine Tree
85. Recycled Air - The Postal Service
86. Standing Outside a Broken Phone Booth With Money In my Hand - Primitive Radio Gods
87. Imitation of Life - REM
88. The Bends - Radiohead
89. Creep - Radiohead - I bet all y'all cried to this some one drunk night
90. Kiss Off - Violent Femmes
91. Suicide Medicine - Rocky Votolato
92. Alone, Jealous, and Stoned - Secret Machines
93. Saint Simon - The Shins - Funny, this is the ONLY Shins song that ever made me cry. Sorry, Garden State.
94. Good Things - Sleater Kinney
95. Thirty-Three - The Smashing Pumpkins
96. Beautiful- The Smashing Pumpkins
97. Sick of Goodbyes - Sparklehorse
98. Up The Junction - Squeeze
99. Tempted - Squeeze
100. Alcoholiday - Teenage Fanclub
Well that's 100 damn songs. I will only add two more.
The most recently discovered song that makes me cry - Mockingbirds - Grant Lee Buffalo
Lastly, the song I listened to on repeat in the saddest moment of my life (thus far) Kiwi Maddog 20 20 - Elliott Smith
Sunday, September 1, 2013
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